When Dementia and Bereavement Change Everything: Knowing When a Parent May Need More Support

Losing a partner can change everything for someone living with dementia.

For families, it can change everything too.

When Dad dies and Mum is living with dementia, the family may suddenly find themselves taking on responsibilities that Dad quietly managed every day.

Perhaps he prepared meals, reminded Mum about appointments, helped with medication, did the shopping or simply provided the familiar companionship that helped her feel safe.

Now he isn’t there.

And the family is left asking:

How do we know whether Mum needs more support?

You Don’t Have to Make Every Decision at Once

One of the first things families often feel is pressure.

Should Mum move?

Should someone stay with her?

Does she need a carer?

Is it safe for her to live alone?

Unless there are immediate concerns about her safety, you don’t necessarily have to answer all of these questions straight away.

Start by looking at how she is managing now.

Bereavement can affect someone with dementia in ways that aren’t always immediately obvious. Changes in routine, anxiety and the loss of a familiar companion can make everyday life more difficult.

You might notice that Mum is:

• Forgetting to eat or drink
• Struggling with medication
• Becoming more anxious or confused
• Losing confidence with everyday tasks
• Repeatedly asking where her partner is
• Becoming reluctant to leave the house
• Calling family members repeatedly
• Finding evenings particularly difficult

None of these things automatically mean that someone can no longer live at home.

They may simply be signs that some additional support could make life easier.

Sometimes a Little Support Is Enough

When families think about care, they can sometimes imagine someone needing support throughout the entire day.

That isn’t always the case.

For some people, a regular morning visit may be enough to help them get up, have breakfast and start their day.

For someone else, it might be help preparing lunch, support with medication or a familiar person visiting for companionship.

It could be a walk in the garden, help with personal care or simply having someone there who knows their routines and understands what matters to them.

Small amounts of consistent support can make a significant difference.

Familiarity Can Be Reassuring

After losing a lifelong partner, there may already be enough change for someone living with dementia to cope with.

Moving home can mean leaving behind familiar surroundings, routines, neighbours and possessions.

For many people living with dementia, these familiar things can provide reassurance.

This is one reason dementia care at home can be such an important option for families.

Rather than immediately changing where someone lives, personalised home care can provide support around the individual while allowing them to remain in the environment they know.

What If the Family Can’t Be There All the Time?

This is often where families begin to struggle.

You may want to visit every day.

You may want to make sure Mum has eaten, taken her medication and isn’t feeling lonely.

But you may also have work, children, relationships and your own responsibilities.

Trying to become a full-time carer isn’t always realistic.

And asking for professional support doesn’t mean that you are letting your parent down.

It means you are recognising that consistent care is important and that you can’t be everywhere at once.

Home care can work alongside family support, providing help when relatives aren’t able to be there.

Dementia Care Can Be Built Around the Individual

There isn’t one standard level of dementia care that works for everyone.

Someone may need occasional companionship and practical support.

Someone else may need more regular help with personal care and everyday routines.

The important thing is understanding the person and what they actually need.

At Wellbeing Homecare Services, we take the time to listen to families and understand their loved one’s routines, preferences and circumstances.

Our personalised home care can include companionship, help with everyday routines, personal care and other practical support, depending on individual needs.

The aim is to help people remain as independent as possible while providing reassurance for the person receiving care and their family.

You Don’t Have to Know All the Answers

If your family has recently lost a parent and the other parent is living with dementia, it is completely understandable to feel unsure about what to do next.

You don’t have to decide everything today.

You don’t have to become your parent’s full-time carer.

And you don’t have to navigate the situation alone.

Sometimes the most useful first step is simply talking to someone who understands dementia care at home and can help you explore the options available.

Wellbeing Homecare Services supports families across Derby and Derbyshire with compassionate, personalised care at home.

If you are worried about a parent living with dementia after bereavement, call 01332 52 75 43 to have a friendly, no-obligation conversation about your family’s circumstances.

You can also contact our team to discuss your options and arrange a home visit.

You don’t have to have all the answers. Sometimes you just need someone to help you work out what comes next.

Which areas do Wellbeing Homecare Services cover?

We support families across Derby, Mickleover, Littleover, Allestree, Darley Abbey, Little Eaton, Duffield, Chellaston, Aston on Trent, Weston on Trent and surrounding areas.

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👉 Get in touch today for friendly, no-obligation advice or home visit